Friday, March 4, 2011


Listen, when you are in my class there are a few rules you MUST abide by. I really would preferred it if you looked at the board and read it before you start asking questions, but I know that may be too much to ask before 9 am, so I won't get too mad about that. Also know that I will ALWAYS give an explanation of the WOD before we start. Really. I promise. We'll even practice some movements before hand so you know what you're doing. I am there to help you be the best darn athlete you can be and if that means I have to watch you do every single rep so you get it right, then so be it. I don't mind. I love it, actually. Keeping this in mind, here are my rules:

1. Do it right. Whatever it is you are doing at the gym, do it right. If you aren't doing it right, I will see it and do one of three things (after correcting you, of course): 1) Make you redo that rep, 2) Make you do more of them until it is right, or, in stubborn cases, 3) Threaten you with a sledge hammer (since I can't find my whoopin' stick).

2. Do your best. I don't care how fast or slow you are or how much weight you can lift. You chose to show up for the class. Make the most of it by doing the very best you can. You will be rewarded (just not with donuts, which happens to be MY favorite reward).

3. DO NOT SIT DOWN. The workouts stink. We all know this. We are all in the same boat. I don't care, get up. You can lean. You can squat. You can make angry faces and swear in my general direction. Heck, I'll even let you get some water. You MAY NOT sit down until you finish the entire WOD. (Passing out is a different story).

This picture was posted in Strong is the New Skinny Facebook page and I feel like it should be the rules at every gym. Apologies for the swears.

I especially like numbers 4, 7, and 8.

Speaking of not sitting, no one came to my 6 am class today. Now that I read my rules, I may know has to be the sledge hammer threat. Anyway, I read a little and then rowed a leisurely 5k to pass the time and warm up my back. I did it in 24:14. Some people came to the 7 am class (YAY!!!), so I worked out with them.

Friday, March 4

Kari Partner WOD

x3 250m Run/KB Rack Hold
Wall Balls/Wall Sits 10, 9, 8...3
Ball Slams/Plank 10, 9, 8...3
SDLHP/Steering Wheels 10, 9, 8...3
x3 250m Run/KB Rack Hold

There were four people total, so I worked with one of the groups as a third wheel. The run felt so good. I am so glad the weather is getting nicer out. I used a 12lb Wall Ball, a 15lb Slam Ball, and a 30lb KB for the SDLHP. I felt like such a hypocrite for the SDLHP because I wanted to use at least 45lbs, but my back was just not having it. Everything else was fine. I worked with Michelle and Patrick. We did it in about 35 minutes, but I don't know the exact time. Barry and Jane rocked it today! I love my morning classes. ::sigh:: The feeling is probably not mutual. Ha!

7am Class = WINNERS

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

How to Translate CrossFitese, a Short Tutorial

If you walk into a CrossFit gym for the first time and are completely confused about what the heck is going on, have no fear. You are not alone. Weird acronyms and unusual phrases are all around you and before you know it, you are wondering why in the world you are there and devising a plan to sneak out before anyone sees you. TOO LATE! The perky trainer spotted you and is now talking to you in CrossFitese.

This is me at my other job. Cardio Salsa just screams Alison, doesn't it?

Please review the following phrases to make you entrance into the world of CrossFit more comfortable:

1. "Today's WOD is..." means "Here is our workout of the day. Pay attention so the trainer doesn't want to beat you with her whoopin' stick."

2. "It's an AMRAP WOD today!" mean "The workout is made up of as many rounds of possible as you can do in a certain amount of time. Don't you dare stop until time is called."

3. "Let's warm up with some TGUs!" means "We're doing Turkish getups. Yes, I'll show you how to do them. Get a kettlebell and lay down!"

4. "OHSs!!!!!" means "I know everyone else at the gym hates them but overhead squats are my favorite thing in the world so shut your yammer and grab a stick to practice!"

5. "We've got some SDLHPs today." means "Sumo Deadlift High Pulls are on tap for today. They are called 'Sumo' for a reason, get those feet apart!"

Once you become comfortable with these phrases, you will soon hear everything in CrossFitese. It is inevitable. You may even buy yourself some Chuck Taylors or a WODKilla T-Shirt. Eventually, you may have to go to a chiropractor for your achin' back. Eventually that chiropractor may say "Alright! I want you to go all out on your workouts!" You may or may not hear "You're good to go! Do what you want!" You WILL go all out on the next workout and you WILL wake up in the fetal position the next morning with back spasms. When you question the chiropractor, he will say "I mean go all out within reason. Don't hurt yourself."

Stupid CrossFitese, messing up my translations.

Anyway, now that I got all of that straightened out and clarified, I am continuing to modify the WODs (QUICK! What does that mean? Check the list!) so as not to injure myself bad. Here is how it has been working out:

Tuesday, March 1

Back Squats and Shoulder Press

Row 2k

I only went up to 95lbs on the Squats. They were alright. I managed to do 2 of my working sets at 80lbs for the Shoulder Press. I did 3 reps at 80 of my last 5 but then had to Push Press the last 2. Getting better!

Monday, February 28

For Time:

10 Thrusters (40/25)
20 Ring Dips
30 Box Jumps
40 Pull Ups
50 Sit Ups
60 Burpees
50 Sit Ups
40 Pull Ups
30 Box Jumps
20 Ring Dips
10 Thrusters

I Used 25lb dumbbells for the Thrusters, did Ring Dips with Lil' Red, tried to do 24" Box Jumps but had to go back to Step Ups, and used Ol' Blue for the Pull Ups. Burpees make my back feel better. Yikes! I finished in 26:45. Not too shabby for being broken I think. 

I am going to get better! I AM!!! And this trainer is totally going to help me:

She has built in leg warmers. Fantastic!

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Strong is the New Skinny Body Transformation Challenge

One of my favorite websites Practical Paleolithic and its movement Strong is the New Skinny is hosting a Body Transformation Blog Challenge and I am taking part. I have been thinking a lot about my fitness goals as I am being severely hindered by an injury. In order to do this challenge and to keep myself in check, I am incorporating the injury into my goals. So here they are:

1. Eat clean foods and meals (meaning that I am following general Paleo guidelines) 90% percent of the time. I am doing pretty well with this, minus weekends. This one will be the hardest I think.

2. Let myself heal. I am not going to be able to go forward if I keep reinjuring my back. I know this goal should be an unsaid thing, but if you know me at all, you know I am not good at listening to myself. Now that I think about it, this one might be the hardest.

3. I would like to be able to do my previous working weights for deadlift and back squat by the end of the summer. I am not sure how long my back is going to take to heal but I know that it can take a while, so I am shooting for the end of summer. If it takes longer, so be it.

Previous working Deadlift: 215#
Previous working Back Squat: #175

4. I still want to do a frakkin' muscle up!

5. During this challenge I would like to keep track of inches lost, though I am not overly concerned with it. I do want to take note of it just so see if it changes with my diet. It should, but I would like proof. So here are my current measurements:

Waist: 29.5 inches
Hips: 36.5 inches
Thighs/butt: 40.5 inches (and this, my friends, is why I can't find jeans that fit. But I CAN squat a large amount of weight. Booyah!)

This is my new favorite picture:

Maybe another goal should be a 95# TGU!
I got the ok from Doc yesterday saying I could go all out on the WODs and that he would adjust his treatment to my training (get it? ADJUST? Bahahahaha! I love chiropractic jokes. They CRACK me up!) So I went straight to the gym after my appointment and proceeded to go all out on yesterday's WOD:

Saturday, February 26


3 Rounds for Time:

400m Run
21 KB Swings (1.5 pood)
12 Pull Ups

This is a short and sweet WOD and I scaled it down to a 1 pood KB (16kg) mostly because there is only one 1.5 pood KB at the gym and I am not exactly sure how much that weighed off the top of my head (I just looked it up, its about 52 pounds). I also did all Kipping Pull Ups with no band help. I did the whole thing in 11:00 and collapsed at the end. Also, my back is spasming so badly today I could hardly get out of bed. Fantastic. I am typing this up while wearing my super sexy old lady heating pad.

So much for all out.